Monday, December 15, 2008

Watching Paint Dry? God & Church.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I’ve always been ahead of my time. Whereas you lot got bored of Church in your teens and stopped going, I left Sunday school when I was 7. I still had to go to Church though, but preferred to sit in the service with my Mum then go to Sunday school. After I finished my training and was made a local preacher my old Sunday School teacher came and congratulated me with tears of pride in her eyes, which quickly turned to tears of long-felt pain as she related the tale of the 7 year old who told her that he was bored of what she was doing and stormed out the room never to return. She retired from Sunday school teaching shortly after that.

And yet here I am just a few years later (OK more than just a few) a fully paid up member of the People-Who-Not-Only-Go-To-Church-But-Contribute-To-Whatever-Happens-On-A-Sunday Club. So what’s happened to make a difference? Do I still get bored of what happens on a Sunday? If so, how and why do I cope?

The first thing to say is, yes I do still find that Church can be dull. There are times when, instead of feeling uplifted, I feel frustrated, sometimes even angry. But the way that I’ve come to view Church has changed, so I can cope with Sunday mornings being bland because of what else Church has become to me.

Over the years Church has done a lot for me, maybe that’s a reason I’ve stuck with it. After I’d decided I wasn’t interested in playing the rubbish they make you learn for school concerts it was Church that offered me the opportunities to play music in public, and it was Church that gave me the first chances I had to mess around with PA gear and recording. I met many great people through Church, and my friends from ‘back home’ are all church friends some of whom I’ve known for over 20 years. At Church I felt listened to and I fitted in more than I ever did at school.
That’s an experience that continued as I moved around. Churches I’ve attended have been welcoming and when I’ve sat in a Church as a visitor and participated in traditional Methodist Worship it’s been like putting on an old familiar jumper – perhaps a bit shabby round the edges and something you wouldn’t want to be judged for wearing but it’s warm and comforting and holds a lot of good memories.

But Church is more than just a nostalgic trip - Church is for the here and now. Church still offers me opportunities to be heard – through this blog and through my being a local preacher, and although I don’t play much music in Church anymore I’m still frequently found at the back of the room sitting behind a mixing desk trying to look important. And there’s still more that Church offers – I seem to lead a charmed existence free from the difficulties which dog some people, but I know from experience that I can count on the Church for support when such events occur. I’ve seen many people supported and uplifted through difficult times by their Church. Knowing that there are people who do care for you and are willing to help you is of itself a source of strength, and this is what a Church can provide.

But Church is even more than that! What I’ve described above is a social club, there has to be something that makes Church unique. I discovered what it was when I was in my teens. I discovered that this God thing that people talked about was of interest to me and I started to explore what that meant. I soon realised that the people who frequented Church also had an interest in God and an experience of Him and so as people shared and talked about what they knew of God it strengthened my own ideas and they turned into a faith. Church became a means to an end. The point of Church wasn’t Church. The point of Church was as a vehicle to reach God, and as such a vehicle - for all it’s faults and weaknesses - it’s objective and ideals keeps me coming back to further my own journey.


Not everyone’s experience is like mine. A lot of people have very bad experiences in Churches. Church is often called a ‘family’ and a lot of the good experiences I’ve described can be paralleled in a family, and just like there are good families and bad families so there are good Churches and bad Churches. Even when we find a good Church there will be bad points to it – just as there’s always a family member you don’t get on with you’ll find a Church member who you find annoying, difficult, hostile, un-accepting or any other negative human reaction you care to name. Like a family the bad experiences we have in Church hurt more because of what Church is meant to be. Sometimes our families can do us great damage – as can Church. But with Church we can find a new place to undo the damage and learn to belong.

Just like in a family, we need to be an active participant in Church to get the most out of it. It doesn’t do any good simply sitting and moaning about how there is nothing of interest to us at Church. We have to actively effect the change we want to see in Church to make it interesting and relevant. We have to be the Church we want to belong to

This is what Café Sundae tries to do – we try to demonstrate the Church in action as we see it should be, and help others find their place in Church and in Gods family.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well it seems to me like we all have different ideas about the church and what it stands for in our lives. Although many people believe that going to church is scoring points for the afterlife many people may go against this theory and believe that its more a social event than a way of getting into heaven.
I admit it. I'm agnostic. And although thats probably spelt wrong I still stand by it. Many people think being agnostic as the "safe way" because it means that they feel they're not necessarily atheist. Me? I'm just confused.
The idea of going to church every sunday for a service, to be honest, doesn't exactly appeal to me. Maybe because I had a bad experience from when I was younger and was forced to do a very boring church parade with the beavers, cubs and eventually scouts. I sat there and was told to be still and listen to things that, at the younger age that I used to be, I didn't understand nor really care for whilst these men and women sat up there and monotonously droned on about this guy called jesus and doing many boring things using big words and bad attempts to get the kids involved made the hour service seem like a year.

Anyways I'm dragging on so I'll leave you with this:

If we're trying to keep the old people and young people from terrorizing the streets.

What are we going to do about the middle age lunatics that rome the streets at night.

Will Sudworth.

CJ Stoby said...

I think Church is a place where everyone at some point i their lives must have attended, making it a social and moral background to it's congregations lives.
Adam you spelt 'Agnostic' right, and i too find it difficult to drag my arse out of bed on sunday morning (other than to watch f1) to come to church but i make other commitments based around the church like in the BB (evidently better than scouts - ADAM!) or at TSL.
I have memorys of church when i was little , i was laughing in the service and got severly told off for it, but honestly why cant we have a little fun (excluding old jokes that no youths get!) why make it boring - i think cafe sundae is a step forward.
The avaergae of age groups attending church needs to decrease to support a prominant future for the church.

Jayne said...

Well I really enjoyed reading your blog Rob, my dear mother "religiously" goes to chapel every Sunday, me I only go when I feel that I want to go but that doesn't mean that I do not have faith I do a lot of background work for a our little village Methodist Chapel.
Whilst I've given up trying to explain my faith in God to many folk I found your explanation of church/chapel quite heartwarming. I like to look at my God using the letter of his name. Good Orderly Direction. I too get easily bored with some of our preachers who appear to like the sound of their own voices rather than what they are saying (you are always going to get this in all walks of life) but I try to turn a blind eye to this and listen to the message portrayed. I'm glad I have a faith in my life it may not be of any help to some but to me it is very important.
Keep up the ggod work with your cafe sundae Rob, we need more good people in this ever changing world of ours!!
Jayne